blank'/> Laughing Through the Silences: Pretty Witty

Pretty Witty

"Dear Voldemort, 
My Children are sick of having scars. Harry writes Hufflepuff every day after games with the snitch. Sirious Black loves Smeagol but professor Snape will always love me. 
PS) Katniss & Peeta hate you."

 "Then, we bought him a pineapple....cause he's Hawaiian.........and we're racist!!!"

Me: This is so yummy! What's the secret ingredient, Dad?! Love?
Dad: No. Soy sauce.

"Yeah. The cliques were much more poetic about bashing each other."

"What is the difference between a horcrux and a paradox?"

Mom: It's nice to see you guys so happy.
Nate: This only happens when there's food.

Me: Families that eat together stick together.
Dad: No. Families that have Gorilla Glue fights together stick together.

Nate: How bout you pull a u-turn, Dad.
Dad: How bout you pull my finger, Nate.

I've sure done a lot of things in my life and that was definitely one of them. 

Of all the people that I know, you're sure one of them. 

Me: I hope that you appreciate that I just chucked your bag into the back of your car.
Bailey: It's a good thing that my delicate panties weren't in there.

-You guys should really apologize for making fun of her music.
-Alright. I'll apologize by buying her a decent CD.

Me: 5 is a good age to be butt naked.
Bailey: YEAH it is! Knucks!!!

Me: Hahaha. Sorry. This really isn't funny!
Mr. Bright: You're right. It isn't. But you and Miss Whitehead are going to laugh anyways.

"I don't know anybody with blonde hair and feet."

"You know how sometimes life gives you lemons? Well, sometimes life gives me ceramic donkeys."

Nate: You know what I love about senior pictures?
Kaycee: What?
Nate: Even the ugliest girl can edit it to make it look good.
Kaycee: Like who?
Nate: Well, I have a picture of you in my room...

Brandon: Are there any nutless yams?
Uncle Stan: Yeah. On the counter........You know what they say: You are what you eat.

Jackie: My great grandma died.
Me: I'm so sorry.
Jackie: It's okay. The only time that I talked to her was when she thought that I was pregnant with my father's child.

"I'm a lot hotter than I look!"

"My dad thinks that you look like Orville Redenbacher."
"Oh! He came up to me earlier and said something about popcorn. Now I get it!"

Seriously the funniest blog ever.